Taiwan Day #2

With all the excitement at a temporary standstill over prop 8 and Butch Jamie's DVD release, I thought I'd pick up where I left off on my trip to Taipei last month. I've only gotten through the first day, and I have four more to go! If you need to catch up, you can read Day 1 part 1 here and Day 1 part 2 here.


Whereas my first day in Taiwan I took the most photos, my second day I took the least. But I still had a very productive day.

I started the morning off at the National Palace Museum, which is on the outskirts of the city.



Below you can see some of the surrounding greenery.



We weren't allowed to take photos inside, so that's it for the museum. The inside was nice, but I'm not a huge fan of museums in general (even though I really do try to go and be cultural) so I'm not a good one to ask. But if you're looking for a museum in Taipei, this one is supposedly the best.

After that, my guide and I went for dim sum, which I was introduced to when I visited Hong Kong several years ago. I have since been only once, in Chinatown here in L.A. My guide told me that dim sum originated in Hong Kong, although it's very popular in Taiwan. The restaurant we went to is open 24 hours and is a popular place to go after clubbing. I didn't take any photos, but we ate lots of tasty little items. As you may know, the whole concept of dim sum revolves around eating several dishes of small appetizer-type items, such as a plate with three dumplings, another plate with two small seafood tarts, etc.

Like in Korea, you don't tip in Taiwan, which is a really convenient custom except of course when you want someone to go out of their way for you. When my guide asked our cab driver to make a quick stop at a convenience store on the way to our destination, he refused. He did drop us off at the store, but didn't want to wait for us while we were inside. So I guess tipping does lead to some benefits after all.

That evening, I saw two films from fellow visiting filmmakers. The festival had organized a forum for us in a couple of days to talk about the production of our projects, and beforehand we made a point to see each other's films. Also that night, we went to a filmmaker's party that the festival had organized.

So that's it for Day 2. I took a lot more photos on Day 3, so I'll be back soon with more of my adventures.

Jsh-amie le Butch

Butch Jamie is now officially on DVD! Here's David and I at the release party last Wednesday (OK, so the photo's a little cheesy. But kind of cute, right?) -


We had a fun time at the party. I had a friend of mine who I haven't seen since my Freshman year of high school unexpectedly show up, as well as a couple of fellow Smith College alums. I ran into a representative from Here TV who told me that they're buying the TV rights (they've been in negotiations for awhile, so it hadn't yet been official). They raffled off some free DVDs and David won Season 5 of the L Word which he gave to me.

Earlier this week, After Ellen published an interview I did with them -

"Michelle Ehlen is a cinematic jack (or should we say jill?) of all trades. For her debut feature, Butch Jamie, she wrote, directed, produced, starred and edited the film, which centers on the adventures of a struggling butch lesbian actress in L.A. who lands a male role and runs with it. Shot on a shoestring budget in upstate New York, the film landed Ehlen Best Actress accolades at the 2007 Outfest film festival in L.A., and the laughter of just about everyone in queer festival audiences around the country."
--Click here for the rest of the article.

Also, I found out that my French distribution company, Optimale, will be releasing the DVD soon. Check out the totally pimped out, bling-bling DVD cover they designed -



As for the U.S./Canadian DVD, you can order it through several different retailers, including Wolfevideo.com. You can also rent it through Netflix, Blockbuster, and many independent stores.

The Right Side of History

I realize I'm preaching to the choir here, but let's get a couple of things straight. The GLBT community and our allies are not sore losers.

First of all, Prop 8 shouldn't be something that people vote on in the first place. Civil rights are not voted upon by people. The majority has no place to decide things for a minority. A democracy is not just defined as "majority rules." Taken from dictionary.com, a democracy is also - "a state of society characterized by formal equality of rights and privileges" and "political or social equality."

To preserve the essence of a democracy, a majority vote does not always prevail. In this case, the CA Supreme court has agreed to hear cases that challenge Prop 8. The argument for our side says that it should be deemed unacceptable a) because it constitutes a revision of, rather than an amendment to, the constitution, and b) Prop 8 violates the separation of powers doctrine under the constitution.

It always amazes when I think about how our forefathers got it "right" way back in the day - "all men are created equal," "life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness," and the separation of church and state. Granted, "all men are created equal" did not mean the same thing then as it does today. But I think the brilliance of the document lies in the fact that it has always been something for us to aspire to. We are not quite there - yet. It's almost like the constitution is full of goals instead of self-evident truths and rights.

The separation of church and state, or rather lack there of, is a huge problem. We do not have a separation. When you file for a marriage certificate, you do not become legally married until you have a ceremony. It doesn't matter where you do it, but you must do it. The fact that someone can go to a church and become married in God's eyes and in the government's eyes at the exact same moment, weds the function of church and state. These things should be separate. The state should consider you married after you sign the paperwork, and if you choose to have a ceremony in a church before or after that, that should be a separate transaction. As such, there is no distinction, for many people, between civil marriage and religious marriage. The fact is, it is not the state's business to determine who is fit to get married, who can have their love legally sanctioned and their sexual relations deemed appropriate. Marriage is a legal contract between two people. For the state to determine who can and cannot enter a contract with another person is ludicrous. As such, the state has no real business "marrying" people. Its only function is to facilitate the rights and responsibilities that both people agree to take on.

I've had two straight friends of mine ask me what we hope to accomplish with these protests. While it seems obvious to me and many other people, I have to think that the question is still valid. I tell them that there is hope that the courts will deem Prop 8 an inapropriate revision to the constitution. But I'm quick to say that it's more than just that. This is a movement, a civil rights movement. Things happen because people get involved. They raise awareness, they start talking about it. Never before have our straight allies stepped up to the plate so significantly. Keith Olbermann would probably not just wake up one day and say "Hey, today is the day I'm going to talk about gay rights." Or if he had, it certainly wouldn't have been as passionate, persuasive, or as poignant as it was. Things like this are happening because we're causing them to happen. The comedian Wanda Sykes just recently came out of the closet because of Prop 8. I met a lesbian at Butch Jamie's DVD release party last night who told me she wouldn't have been there before Prop 8. Really, prop 8 had an effect on the release party? It sounds silly, but it's true. She told me that prior to the proposition, she was disconnected from the GLBT community but was OK with it. But after it passed, she wanted to get more connected. It may seem inconsequential, but it's not. There are thousands of people across the country, potentially millions across the world, that are in some small way modifying or changing their life because of this. Small changes lead to big changes; there is no other way.

A video titled Why Do We Protest? on YouTube Answers the question with these simple facts:
-We cannot marry in 48 states
- We can be fired for being gay in 31 states
-We can be removed from military service
-We are not protected under federal law
-We will no longer be ignored

It is not true that protests do not accomplish anything. All civil rights movements have happened because of the number of people who took to the streets to stand up for what they believed in. For the queer community, the Stonewall Riots 40 years ago kicked off the modern day GLBT movement that we are now living. Everything happens step by step - one thing happens, then another, then another, and then one day Ellen comes out of the closet and the world is never the same again. Seriously.

I've read some comments online that say gay people should just accept this and get over it. To quote George Bernard Shaw - “The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore, all progress depends on the unreasonable man.” I understand, as I wrote in a post a few days ago, that the difference between myself and my opponents is that I am in favor of change and they are not. We can agree to disagree on this, but it doesn't change the fact that change is happening and will continue to happen. You can fight it while we facilitate it; you can maybe slow it down if you're lucky, but it is impossible - impossible for you to stop it. I love the sentiment our movement embraces - "We are on the right side of history."

Lastly, I understand why many religious institutions are riled up about this. I truly do understand their position, regardless of my desire for them to believe otherwise. But this isn't about religion. This isn't about God, sanctity, or tradition. Your God, and your Bible, and your church can believe whatever it wants to. These things have no place in our government. The fact that the President of the United States has to be Christian or he won't get elected is bad enough. For a country that was founded on religious freedom, our Puritanical roots run far deeper than they should. The fight over same-sex marriage is no more than the fight over the relationship between church and state. I hate to break it to you, but it's time for a divorce. And we shouldn't be part of the custody battle.

With that said, here are some more photos from the protest here in L.A. last Saturday -

Jus mindin' mah own bizness

At the wrong place at the wrong time. I was out walking around my neighborhood - it was about 10:00pm, and there was a helicopter flying above with a spotlight looking for someone. The light shined on me and I hoped they didn't think I did it, whatever it was. I was in the back alley behind my apartment, and as I walked up the steps, I thought about how my friend Ange had told me to blog about my irrational fears. "Hey, that could be a good one," I thought. "That I'm afraid when the helicopter spotlight shines on me, they think I did it." (OK, so maybe it's not really that good of an idea. I wasn't really going to blog about it...)

I went inside my apartment and started cooking a pot of split pea soup. 5 minutes later, the L.A. police department was shouting outside my neighbor's door (by the way, we live in a nice neighborhood and this kind of thing is definitely not common). "This is the Los Angeles Police Department!! COME OUT NOW! Is there anyone else inside! Everyone needs to come out!"

Holy shit...

I walked to my screen door and just stood there, kind of waiting. I knew I was next.

"Don't come out yet, sir," he said to me. "OK - come out. Slowly, slowly!" I walked out and saw four guns aimed out me, one of which was a huge mother fuckin' rifle.

"Turn around! Slowly! Put your hands up in the air! Slowly! Put them on your head - slowly!"

Slowly, slowly, slowly...just please don't shoot.

"Put the cuffs on him!" A cop came forward and cuffed me. What the fuck? I thought they were just here looking for the bad guys...

I was escorted out of the building (and had to tell one of the cops to please turn off my stove) and was given to another cop. "Here, take him," he said. "He or she?" the other said. "She," I answered. "Sorry," he said. "It's OK." I'm not too concerned about that right now...

The woman who took me put me at ease. "We'll let you know what's going on in a minute. We just have to detain you and ask you some questions."

I stood against the police car and was patted down while she emptied my pockets. I was then asked to sit in the back of the car. The seats didn't have any cushions on them. They were made out of a hard plastic.

"Have you ever been arrested before?" "No." "Do you live here?" "Yes." "Why were you walking so fast back to your apartment?" "I don't know...I was out walking. Trying to get some exercise."

I sometimes walk in my neighborhood late at night. I could definitely look very suspicious at that time of night if something were to happen. "I need to get a gym membership," I thought to myself.

She continued to ask me more questions, most of which were repetitions of the first two - "Have you ever been arrested?" and "Do you live here?"

Thank God I'd never been arrested before. I did have the cops call my parents once when my friend and I were caught drinking in the bathroom stall at Macy's when I was 17. But that didn't really count.

...Did this count? Am I going to have to answer the next time "Yes, I've been arrested before"?

"Have you ever gotten a ticket before?" she asked. I didn't know what that had to do with it, but I think I got some bonus points after I answered "No."

"There was a robbery that just happened," she told me. "You look like one of the suspects. Step out of the car." She escorted me toward another police car, where my neighbor, who is black, was standing in cuffs. I felt worse for him than for me. Even so, I was hoping that he didn't think I did it. Maybe he was thinking the same thing about me.

"Look up," she said as the helicopter flew above us. I knew they were getting an ID on us. I wondered if we were going to be on the news. "Look up," she said again, as the helicopter made another circle around. I was wearing a hat. If the suspect had been wearing a hat as well, I knew that wouldn't be good. I thought that maybe I should stop wearing that hat so much.

I was escorted back to the cop car and sat for awhile. I wasn't nervous. The whole thing was too surreal to have an effect on me, and I did seem to think that they would know this was all a misunderstanding. But I did wonder if I'd have to call in absent from work to tell them I was in jail. I knew that the people at work would believe me if I told them I didn't do it. If they did take me to the station, I wondered if they'd let me go back up to my apartment so I could get my keys, lock my door, and turn off my lights. I wondered if I would have to go on trial. And miss my DVD release party on Wednesday. I was glad that I didn't have plans with anyone at that moment or anything really important to do. I was also really glad that I didn't have to go to the bathroom and that I was fully dressed and not in the middle of doing something crucially embarrassing when the cops came. Their timing was, for lack of a better word, perfect.

I fiddled with my wrists in the cuffs, making sure my hands weren't going numb. "Feel free to stretch out back there," the cop told me, "I know it's not the most comfortable." She was pretty cool. But stretch out? That didn't really seem like a possibility, what with the cuffs and hard plastic seats and all. I barely had room for my legs back there, and I'm 5'5".

After awhile, I was escorted to a wall where the cop took my cuffs off, and my neighbor was released as well. Another cop came over and started chatting with me about it. He told me how the jewelry store down the block had just gotten robbed. They saw the suspects go up the steps to our building but not come out, so they had to get everybody out of the building and question them (my neighbor and I happened to be the only two who were home). Talking to me, he was very friendly and smiley. We were no longer "cops" and "robbers" but now just Bob and Michelle. You know Bob, you did have a gun pointed at me earlier.

"Do you have any questions?" he asked. They still hadn't found the people who did it, but I didn't want to push my luck by asking how they knew it wasn't us. But I did want to clarify - "...Does this count as being arrested?" "No," he laughed. I don't think he had heard that one before. I knew it was a naive question.

After that, we were on our way. I suppose that's one less irrational fear I have now - met and overcome. I can probably check that one off my list, or at least just acknowledge that the fear wasn't so irrational after all. I don't know what it all means or if it has to mean anything. But I figured since I lived to tell about it, I may as well.

I believe

I know that prop 8 isn't really about hate. It's about fear - fear of the unknown, and of change and progress. I believe that the fundamental difference between myself and someone against same-sex marriage is not sexuality. It's not religion, ignorance, or even tolerance. It's the idea that I believe that the direction our world is evolving, on all levels, is a very good thing. I believe that the world will someday be a much better place than it is and that it has been. Change works in our favor, not against us. And time will eventually bring us peace, not chaos.

I actually have great sympathy for people who cling to the past as if it's a blanket of security. They somehow believe that society is destroying itself, and that the world is headed for anarchy and destruction. They may believe in God, but they don't believe in people. They seem to think that left to our own devices, we will all deteriorate into beasts and monsters.

I believe that God did create us in his image. I believe that the peace and love inside all of us is a far greater force than any amount of so called evil. I don't believe that humanity is losing the fight to become a magnificent race of people. I believe in us. I believe in people. And I believe in our future.

DVD release party!

This morning I went to the protest against prop 8 in downtown L.A. - I'll be posting photos from that soon. In the meantime, I wanted to announce the DVD release party that's happening for Butch Jamie here in L.A. My co-star David Au and I will both be there. Hope to see you there!

Nationwide Protest!

It's gonna be frickin' huge. The nationwide protest this Saturday is happening in every single state and hundreds of cities across the country at the same time. The passage of prop 8 has kicked off a huge GLBT civil rights movement, and the community has vowed that it will not stop fighting until real progress is made.

Click on the icon below to see the locations from jointheimpact.com

Also, in case you haven't already seen Keith Olbermann's heartfelt and honest plea to the American people about the issue, here's the video -

Santa Barbara

Last Friday I drove up to Santa Barbara, a beach town about 2 hours north of L.A., for a screening at the OUTrageous Film Festival.


That evening, there was a candlelight vigil against prop 8 that I missed, but I showed up in time to catch the protest afterward.



Saturday I spent part of the day watching films and the other part enjoying the gorgeous views.







Saturday night I went to a party that the festival put on. I wasn't expecting to stay long - I had already checked out of my hotel, and I planned to drive back to L.A. that night. But I met up with a group of lesbians who had seen Butch Jamie the night before, and we ended up partying into the wee hours of the night. I had a little too much to drink and even have some scandalous photos to prove it!
...But I won't be posting those here (I know, such a tease).

I ended up crashing at someone's place for the night, and then a group of us met up for breakfast the next day at an oceanside cafe.



It ended up being a perfect weekend getaway.

I'll Be Back Again Someday

Last weekend I went to Santa Barbara for a screening of the film. I had no expectations and ended up having an excellent time. Butch Jamie has been on the festival circuit for a little over a year; during that time I've attended ten festivals, and have traveled around the world and back twice. Sitting in the movie theater during the show this time, I knew that things were coming to a close. And I was ready for them to.

I took a Psychology class when I was 14 and we were supposed to come in and discuss what our favorite fairy tale or story was when we were younger, and what that possibly said about us. My mom told me I loved "Frosty the Snowman"; that as soon as we'd finished reading it, I'd want to read it again and again. As you probably know, Frosty comes to life and there's all this fun and magic that happens, and at the end of it he melts. But before he does, he tells the children "I'll be back again someday."

It's interesting when I look at the way I've chosen to live my life - almost in seasons, with projects, people, places, and things coming and going. I'll confess to you that it was always my fear, as a creative person with a lot of ideas and interests, that I would never finish a project of any longevity. That I would end up with half-written scripts and partially formulated ideas. When I think back on the process of this film, starting nearly four years ago, my endurance has been the most rewarding for me.

For the past year, I've been asking myself "what's next?" "When's it's coming?" "I'm ready for the next chapter of my life. Hello, hello, where is it?" I have been in limbo for awhile - much longer than usual, and it's been a bit uncomfortable for me. I see this film as a sort of bridge from my past life to my future life, and it's been a very long bridge. But I know that part of embracing change is learning to sit with the stagnancy. I always tell myself that things wait to happen until we're ready. We may want to be ready and we may think we are, but most of the time we're not.

I don't believe that life is random and chaotic. It's smart - much smarter than us. It knows when we're ready, and sometimes it gives us a moment of clarity if we're able to listen. As I was watching the film for the 100th time, sitting alone in the third row with the audience completely behind me, I said to myself - "It's now. I'm ready now."

And the fight continues

As you probably know by now, proposition 8, the ballot initiative to eliminate same-sex marriage in CA, won by a narrow margin yesterday.

But we haven't heard the last of it. Protests have been happening all over the state, and there's still some hope that the Supreme Court will overturn the prop.




(the sign above is in reference to a proposition that passed to treat chickens and other farm animals more humanely)



Last night I had the chance to go to the protest here in West Hollywood. When I arrived, a large group of people were blocking a main intersection (Santa Monica Blvd. and San Vicente) during rush hour.





Then a bunch of speakers talked about the issue while another group segmented off and headed up to Sunset Blvd. to protest up there.



This afternoon a group of people went to protest and have a press conference at the Morman Church in West L.A. (I had to work so I couldn't go). During the rally last night, we learned that 45%-65% of the money donated for proposition 8 was from the Morman Church. It's important to add that the movement against prop 8 is careful not to judge Mormans as a group. There were a significant amount of Mormans that spoke out against prop 8, and this was acknowledged during the rally last night. Nevertheless, the leaders of the Morman church are accountable for the massive amount of money donated in favor of the proposition - money that mostly came from out of state and that was used to run TV ads with false information.

On a positive note, we know that time is on our side. Change and progress are inevitable; it's more of a question of when than if. Proposition 22, which passed 8 years ago to ban same-sex marriage in the state (which was overturned by the sumpreme court recently, hence this new proposition) won by a 22% margin, compared to only a 4% margin this time - a huge change in such a short amount of time. There is no doubt that we are headed in the right direction.

"In an expanding universe, time is on the side of the outcast. Those who once inhabited the suburbs of human contempt find that without changing their address they eventually live in the metropolis." -Quentin Crisp