Waiting for the Shoe to Drop

Is it just me, or is this Obama craze making anybody else a little nervous? I didn't think too much about the be-jeweled Obama baby doll tees in the L.A. boutiques, and I laughed a little at the Obama candy bars at the airport. But then when I saw the Obama Big Gulp cups at the 7-11, I started to think that things were getting a little out of hand.

Among the things that I spend the least amount of time on, shopping is high on the list. So I know I'm not the most qualified expert in this area, but this much I know - I've never seen a president merchandised this way before. In my lifetime, I've never even seen a president that people really love. I was 14 when Clinton got elected, and the Monica Lewinsky scandal happened not long after I was old enough to vote. After spending most of my adult life with W., from the year I graduated from college until now, I am of course excited about the promise that Obama brings - reforming health care, revitalizing the economy, ending the war in Iraq, bringing political equality to the GLBT community, and even opening up Cuba, as my Dad thinks will happen under his leadership (and this is from a man who voted for W. The first time).

Obama has become synonymous with the words "change" and "hope", and I love - I really do love that people are excited for something different, but the fact that we've already iconized him makes me a little nervous. We've projected so many wishes and desires onto this man that he's become a cross section between Jesus and Elvis - part savior, part legend. The pedestal we've constructed for him seems so incredibly high that I'm already flinching at the disappointment and disillusionment it seems to foreshadow.

I know I come across as a bit jaded. It surprises me, as I have come to realize that I'm somehow more comfortable with everyone bitching, moaning, and making fun of the president rather than treating him like the second coming. I grew up with Dana Carvey's great impression of Daddy Bush on Saturday Night Live where he made fun of all his trite phrases; I remember the laughs we got out of Dan Quayle's misspelling of potatoe (with the "e" on the end); then there was the ordeal over Monica's stained dress, and then of course, the ridiculousness that we've been living with for the last 8 years.

But I did always want things to be different. I remember falling in love (platonically, of course) with Ross Perot's no nonsense b.s. in the early 90's. I remember rooting for Jesse Jackson in the democratic primaries in the late 80's - yes, just because he was black. I can still remember the hope and desire on the representative's faces from Puerto Rico during that broadcast. I wanted Jesse to win because I could see how much it mattered to them. It didn't matter to me - I was only 10. And I didn't know that he didn't stand a chance in hell at winning.

I do know how much this election means to us, myself included. I think the thing that worries me the most is that if we are not satisfied with the results over the next 4-8 years, if this doesn't work out as we've planned, we'll never allow ourselves to get caught up in the promise of our political future again. When I think about it that way, I know I have to be wrong. I have to be wrong about my sense of impending doom that hovers over this pervasive idealism. I don't believe we're fooling ourselves into thinking we're taking a huge leap forward only to fall back into generations of bitterness. How could I believe that, when life is about progress and change, about moving forward and evolving.

So I can guarantee that you won't be seeing me sporting my Obama skateboard around town (featured above), but I will do my best to stop waiting for the first shoe to drop. And to really start allowing myself to feel a part of this time in history.